going back to Serbia…

I have a dry butter bean in my wallet.  It’s a seed.  It was given to me a couple of years ago as a reminder of a sermon on God-given potential.  Have you ever taken the time to really think about the power of a seed?  As long as the seed sits in a dry dark place with no nutrients, its potential will remain dormant.  But….when you put the seed in fertile ground and water it and expose it to sunlight, it will burst out of its shell.  If you continue to nurture the seed it will grow into a plant.  If you nurture the plant, it will produce more seeds.  If you nurture those seeds, they will produce more seeds.  My dry butter bean is a tangible reminder of what God can do with the potential inside of me or anyone I encounter, when the proper nourishment is given.

For the past several months there has been a whole heap of drama happening in the Serbian adoption community.  For this reason, I’ve refrained from blogging about my upcoming trip to Serbia.  Since it is now just around the corner, and since the needs surrounding the trip far outweigh my desire to avoid drama, I’m ready to write about it.

Matthew 9:37-38 CEV

37He said to his disciples, “A large crop is in the fields, but there are only a few workers. 38Ask the Lord in charge of the harvest to send out workers to bring it in.”

At the end of this month I will be going back to Serbia on a missions trip.  I’M SO STINKIN’ EXCITED!!!  I will be leading a team of people to a school in Republika Srpska that has a special education program and we will be screening approximately 300 children who are waiting for an opportunity to go to school.  We are still looking for a SPEECH PATHOLOGIST and an AUDIOLOGIST to travel with us and perform screenings.  If you are interested, please send me a comment or go to http://www.airlineamb.org/ (you may have to cut and paste the link).  Go to their upcoming trips page and register for the Serbia trip.  Please let me know if funds are an issue.

1 Corinthians 15:37-38 CEB

37 What you put in the ground doesn’t have the shape that it will have, but it’s a bare grain of wheat or some other seed. 38 God gives it the sort of shape that he chooses, and he gives each of the seeds its own shape.

Special needs children in the Serbian region have historically not been educated.  They have not been valued.  They have been marginalized.  The cultural attitudes towards special needs children has led to the majority of those children spending their lives in institutions.  Parents have had choose between abandoning their children or raising them with shame and little support.

The attitudes towards children with disabilities in former communist countries is not all that different from the attitudes in this country half a century ago.  Change is possible!  I have the privilege of working with a woman who has Yugoslavian roots and who served in and retired from the United States military.  This woman has spent the past eleven years working to improve the lives of orphans and special needs children in Serbia.  She was given a building and asked to open a school a few years ago.  She agreed to do so under one condition.  She wanted to use part of the building for special education.  I can imagine that many people laughed at this woman who thought parents would risk scoffing and embarrassment to bring their children to school.  I imagine there were many conversations in the local community about how unlikely it was that this woman’s program would succeed.

But you know what?  Parents came.  They came from miles and miles away.  The took their little seeds out of the dry dark places they had been living and they exposed them to the nourishment it would take for them to reach their God-given potential.  You know why? Because parents want to see their children succeed.  I believe with all that I am that every child has a purpose in life and a potential that must be unlocked.  Every child is a seed.  Without an education, that potential will just live dormant.

The day I leave is exactly one year since the day we brought Sofija home.  I left there just begging God to get us out of there and praying that I never had to go back.  I’m sure God laughed as He sat there with the knowledge that He was only giving me 365 days to prepare my heart for the return.  In those days I’ve watched my daughter transform.  She would not have been able to attend school at all in Serbia.  She has been in school for less than eight months and she is now learning to read.  When we asked the foster family she was living with why they had not adopted her, they responded with, “Because there is no future for her here.”  Don’t get me wrong.  She is ours and we know without a doubt that we were supposed to adopt her.  But…it is still tragic to me that a family who loved her was willing to let her go because they could not see any hope for her potential being unlocked in her own country.

My friend Leah adopted a ten-year old boy with down syndrome in December.  His name is Axel.  Axel’s birth parents loved him, but they saw no hope for him in Serbia so they relinquished their rights and allowed him to be placed on the international adoption registry.  At age ten, Axel had never received any form of education.  He has hearing loss and he was never given any way to communicate.  In four months, he has learned American sign language, his letters, colors, numbers and all the things a toddler is tought in America.  He is now sight-reading and this week, he started school.  Axel’s potential is being unlocked.  His purpose on this planet is just waiting to be revealed.  And….even though Axel was undoubtedly meant to be a part of Leah’s family, I have to believe that the work we are doing will ensure that birth families like Axel’s will soon be free of the formidable choice that his had to make.

Mark 4:30-32

31 Jesus said, It (God’s kingdom) is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest of all seeds on earth. 32 Yet when planted, it grows and becomes the largest of all garden plants, with such big branches that the birds can perch in its shade.”

Let’s go grow some trees!

If you are not a speech pathologist or audiologist and you would still like to step up in support of this trip, there are many needs.  The missions program is through Airline Ambassadors International.  We are going to support the work being done in Serbia and Republika Srpska by Cherish Our Children International (COCI).  Go here to read about COCI’s transportation program http://www.cherishourchildren.org/serbia.html (once again, you may need to cut and paste the link).  They are in desperate need of a handicapped accessible vehicle.  You can make a donation towards the vehicle through the COCI website or through the AAI website.  Just make sure you note where the funds are to be allocated.  If you live around me and you would like to donate school supplies or educational tools for special needs children, I would be happy to carry them with me when we travel.

war weary.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

1 For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
2 A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
3 A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4 A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
5 A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
6 A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
8 A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.

Yes, I have seen the movie Footloose more times than I could ever possibly count.  And yes, I think I learned Ecclesiastes 3 from Kevin Bacon and not from actually reading my Bible.  This blog-post is not about a time for dancing.  It’s about a time for war.

Last night was date night.  My dear hubby took me out for a late dinner and then to Tiffany’s Tavern on King St. in Old Town Alexandria.  If you enjoy bluegrass and you’re in the DC area on a weekend, I highly recommend Tiffany’s.  The people watching is priceless as is the endless playlist of lyrics from classic 70’s songs being sung to bluegrass tunes.  We sat at Tiffany’s and talked about the future.  In the middle of our retirement fantasies a large group of young Air Force airmen occupied the table next to us.  I watched them.  I listened to them.  And I wondered about their families and their futures while trying really hard not to think about what could happen between now and the time my husband retires from the Army.

If you are lucky enough to be a part of my first conversation on any given day, you will likely hear about my dream from the night before.  I’m a vivid dreamer.  I often have dreams about other people’s futures and sometimes those dreams come true.  I have a couple of way-too-vivid recurring dreams that make me more uncomfortable than I care to admit where I’m the main character. Last night I had a dream.  A way-too-vivid dream that I really hope never shows up again or proves to be a vision.

I’m standing in my kitchen when the phone rings.  I notice my husband’s office number on the caller ID as I hit the ‘talk’ button.  He asks, “Are you sitting down?”  I want to vomit.  No uplifting conversation has ever started with those four words.  I order him, “Tell me what is happening.  Now.”  I hear him take a deep breath and then pause before announcing, “I’m deploying to Libya.  Tomorrow.”  The tears began to spill from my eyes.

When I awoke I could not catch my breath.  I hate it when that happens.  When a dream is so real and vivid that it takes my breath away.

This isn’t such a crazy scenario.  The last time I answered a call to those four words I was fighting cancer and my husband was on his way to Iraq (for the second time) ten days later.

This is the life we’ve chosen.  My husband has served our country for more than twenty years.  I have two brothers who have committed their lives to protecting and spreading freedom.  I have a sister-in-law who retired after a long military career and I have another who serves on reserve duty.  I have a son who has dreamed of going to the Air Force Academy since shortly after he learned to talk.  We have countless friends and extended family who are currently serving in one military branch or another.  And I still have a really hard time with that one specific verse of the Bible…. “A time for war and a time for peace.”  I just want a little peace.  Or at least I want it to be someone else’s turn for war.

I really don’t care what political party you affiliate yourself with or what your own personal convictions are about war.  If you live in this country and you enjoy the freedoms of speech, religion, bearing arms, not worrying about illegal search and seizure of your property, fair trials, civil rights, voting or even the fact that there are term limits on the presidency, you have to acknowledge that many men and women have paid a price for you to enjoy those privileges.  Today, less than one-half of one-percent of the American population is serving in our military.  That’s disgusting.  Period.  An even more staggering statistic is that less than eight percent of the entire American population alive today has ever served in our military.

This might just be my first post that has no real point to it.  I needed to vent.  I am not happy that so many of the people I dearly love go to work every day awaiting the announcement of their next deployment.  I am not happy that here, at a time when I really want to plan for what comes after my husband’s military career, I had a dream that totally threw me off track.  I know that there is a time for war.

But, God.  I’m war weary.

caregiver study

If you live in my area and you have your own little stimmer between the ages of 2 and 5,  please keep reading.

Danya International is looking for caretakers of autistic children between the ages of 2 and 5 to participate in a study.  Here’s the info:

The possible dates for experimental group are as follows:

 

GROUP 1:

When:  Thursday Evenings

Thursday, March 24, 7:00-9:00pm

Thursday, March 31, 7:00-8:30pm

Thursday, April 7, 7:00-9:00pm

 

Where: Community Services for Autistic Adults and Children (CSAAC)

The Jane Salzano Center for Autism

Address:
8615 East Village Avenue

Montgomery Village, MD  20886
GROUP 2:

When: Monday Evenings

Monday, April 11, 7:00-9:00pm

Monday, April 18, 7:00-8:30pm

Monday, April 25, 7:00-9:00pm

 

Where: Center for Autism Spectrum Disorders (CASD)

Children’s Outpatient Center of Montgomery County (Neuropsychology)
Address:
15245 Shady Grove Road, Suite 350 (South Building)
Rockville, MD 20850

 

GROUP 3:

When: Wednesday Evenings

Wednesday, April 27, 7:00-9:00pm

Wednesday, May 4, 7:00-8:30pm

Wednesday, May11, 7:00-9:00pm

 

Where: Community Services for Autistic Adults and Children (CSAAC)

The Jane Salzano Center for Autism

Address:
8615 East Village Avenue

Montgomery Village, MD  20886

 

 

Thank you so much for your time, and we truly appreciate your ongoing support of our study.

Thanks again,

 

Elizabeth A. Hicks
Project Associate, Public and Behavioral Health Services
Danya International, Inc.
8737 Colesville Road, Suite 1100 | Silver Spring, MD 20910
Phone: (301) 960-2941 | Fax: (240) 645-1526

www.danya.com

“Innovative Solutions for Social Impact”

 

everybody makes mistakes

Seth has been full of wisdom this week.  On Tuesday he said, “Um, excuse me.  I need some help over here with my math.”  I asked, “Why?”  “I think I’m doing my long division wrong.  None of these problems have any remainders.”  After I checked each problem and assured them that they were all correct, he says, “Hmph!  I guess I’m the perfect child after all.”

Why yes you are, Seth.  We wouldn’t change a single thing about you.

Shortly before his exclamation of self-worth came one of my favorites.  Markey Mark (our behavioral therapist) was sitting on an ottoman watching baby girl sit in the corner.  Seth says, “Excuse me, Markey-Mark.  You’re sitting on my back-pack.”  MM says, “Sorry, Seth.  I didn’t see it there.”  After MM stood up, Seth grabbed his bag, patted MM’s shoulder, and said, “Its okay.  Everybody makes mistakes.”

He gets it. 

Micah 7:18-19 “Who is a God like you?
You forgive sin and overlook the rebellion of your faithful people.
You will not be angry forever, because you would rather show mercy.
You will again have compassion on us. You will overcome our wrongdoing.
You will throw all our sins into the deep sea.”

I love that last line.  “You will throw all our sins deep into the sea.”  Or how about, “You forgive sin and overlook the rebellion of your faithful people.”

We all make mistakes.

Today we did our taxes.  Let’s hope the IRS gets it too. 😉


Julianna’s family :~)

Well, well, well.  Isn’t our God SO FREAKIN’ AMAZING!  Not only did Julianna’s family find her, but they happen to be one of my favorite families on this planet.  That means I get to watch her future unfold from a front-row seat.  I’m a happy girl.

Timing is still urgent.  Her family needs to get her home as quickly as possible.  If you feel inclined to help them get her home, just click on her link in the sidebar: “Giving Julianna a Hope & a Future.”

truth

John 8:30-32

Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. AND YOU WILL KNOW THE TRUTH AND THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE.” NLT

Ephesians 4:15

“Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.”

Seth hopped in the van after school a few days ago and said, “You know what bothers me? When I tell you the truth and get in trouble.”

I had to pause for a second and think about that before asking him what he needed to tell me. How often do we hide the truth from someone simply because we don’t want to face the consequences of “the truth”? How often does the fact that we’ve hidden the truth distract us from everything we should be paying attention to? How often does covering up the truth lead to a whole snowball of lies and guilt and shame and paranoia and distrust?

Before I created this entire blogpost in my thoughts, I stopped and focused on my son. I assured him that even though the consequences of telling the truth can sometimes be painful, it hurts much worse to hide the truth or tell a lie. He then informed me that he used his lunch money to buy a cookie even though he knew that it meant he might have to start taking his lunch (He HATES to take a lunch).

I then had to choose how I would react. He’s been told that if he uses the money from his account for snacks, he will no longer have money on his account. So…do I leave him with no balance and pack him a lunch every day (not a big deal because I’m already packing Sofija’s) or do I show him some grace? At the same moment that I began to ponder this question, I remembered two things.

First: My husband and I had a night a couple of years ago when he was in Iraq where we decided that the truth was always worth the consequences. We realized that there were many moments when our own guilt or shame over a failure to tell the whole truth led to lies, emotional walls and us not trusting one another. The result of that all night conversation has been freedom. “AND YOU WILL KNOW THE TRUTH AND THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE.” It’s true! Secrets and lies will destroy you. Period. The flip side of that is that when someone tells us their truth, we have to show them some grace. So I did. I showed him some grace. To be honest I wanted to laugh. I resisted the urge. I told him that I forgive him and that he gets one more chance. A brilliant friend yesterday suggested that from this point forward I just make him pay me back when he uses his lunch account for snacks. I’m still pondering that idea, but I’m feeling pretty good about teaching him a lesson in honesty.

Which leads to the second thought that came to mind before I showed him grace. When I was finishing up my psychology degree I decided to use my last few electives to take psych classes that interested me. One of them was criminal psychology for psychology majors (there was a completely different curriculum for criminology majors). My professor ended up suggesting that I go to law school because I did such a great job at arguing my case against everything he was teaching. But…I learned A LOT in his class. I was completely fascinated with studying serial killers and the minute I thought about how to react to Seth’s confession I recalled the Toy-Box Killer. His story haunted me for quite a while after I read about him and for various reasons, he’s been a recurring topic of conversation for the past few days. His real name was David Parker Ray and he was also known as the Truth or Consequences Killer because he took his victims to his home near Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. That’s actually the name of a town. Truth or Consequences. I’ve never studied anything about the history of that town, but I’d love to know the reasoning behind that name. I think they should change it to Truth AND Consequences.

“Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ…” Christ didn’t have it easy. He told the truth. He lived the truth. And he did it all with the knowledge that he would face horrible consequences. If we call ourselves Christians, aren’t we saying that we strive to be like Christ? Shouldn’t we always tell the truth with the knowledge that there will likely be consequences? Aren’t the consequences of telling the truth always so much easier than the consequences of not telling it?

Psalm 15:1-2

“O Lord, who may stay in your tent?
Who may live on your holy mountain?

The one who walks with integrity,
does what is righteous,
and SPEAKS THE TRUTH WITHIN HIS/HER HEART.”




application for dating our daughters

The minute our oldest was born we began receiving items about protecting a daughter and those infamous, “applications for dating my daughter”.  Because there is a boy in the picture at the moment that doesn’t seem to have any desire to get to know us personally, I was motivated this morning to sit down and edit and combine the various applications.

Judging by the horrified response of my 16 year old, I’d say I did a pretty good job.

APPLICATION for permission to date my daughter-1

your valentine

God’s Valentine to You

February 14, 2011 by Amanda
Filed under Journal, Morning Show

My Child

I know everything about you…Psalm 139:1
I know when you sit down and when you rise up…Psalm 139:2
I am familiar with all of your ways…Psalm 139:3
Even the very hairs on your head are numbered…Matthew 10:29-31
For you were made in my image…Genesis 1:27
In me you live and move and have your being…Acts 17:28
For you are my offspring…Acts 17:28
I chose you when I planned creation…Ephesians 1:11-12
I knew you even before you were conceived…Jeremiah 1:4-5
I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live…Acts 17:26
You are fearfully and wonderfully made…Psalm 139:14
I knit you together in your mother’s womb…Psalm 139:13
And brought you forth on the day you were born…Psalm 71:6
You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book. Psalm 139:15-16
I have been misrepresented by those who don’t know me…John 8:41-44
I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of love…1 John 4:16
And it is my desire to lavish my love on you…1 John 3:1
Simply because you are my child and I am your father…Matthew 7:11
For I am the perfect father…Matthew 5:48
Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand…James 1:17
For I am your provider and I meet all your needs…Matthew 6:31-33
My plan for your future has always been filled with hope…Jeremiah 29:11
Because I love you with an everlasting love…Jeremiah 31:3
My thoughts toward you are countless as the sand on the seashore. Ps. 139:17-18
And I rejoice over you with singing…Zephaniah 3:17
I will never stop doing good to you…Jeremiah 32:40
For you are my treasured possession…Exodus 19:5
I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul…Jeremiah 32:41
And I want to show you great and marvelous things…Jeremiah 33:3
If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me…Deuteronomy 4:29
Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart…Psalm 37:4
For it is I who gave you those desires…Philippians 2:13
I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine…Ephesians 3:20
For I am your greatest encourager…2 Thessalonians 2:16-17
I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles…2Corinthians 1:3-4
When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you…Psalm 34:18
As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart…Isaiah 40:11
One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes…Revelation 21:3-4
And I’ll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth…Revelation 21:3-4
I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus…John 17:23
For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed…John 17:26
He is the exact representation of my being…Hebrews 1:3
He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you…Romans 8:31
And to tell you that I am not counting your sins…2 Corinthians 5:18-19
Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled…2 Corinthians 5:18-19
His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you… 1 John 4:10
I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love…Romans 8:31-32
If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive me…1 John 2:23
And nothing will ever separate you from my love again…Romans 8:38-39
I have always been Father, and will always be Father…Ephesians 3:14-15
Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen…Luke 15:7

Love, God